Friday, February 29, 2008

Watching?
A local teen flick starring Jodi Sta. Maria, Patrick Garcia, Judy Ann Santos, Piolo Pascual, Baron Geisler, Alessandra de Rossi, Diether Ocampo, Onemig Bondoc at kung sino-sino pa.

Hindi ba halata na hindi ko alam yung title nung movie?

Eh bat ba. Mukhang maganda siya eh. Nakakatawa. Yung naabutan kong eksena caught-in-the-act si Jodi and si Patrick na may...ginagawang...kababalaghan. Well hindi naman. Pero halos ganon narin ang daloy nung kuwento.

Ay punyeta. Tapos na.

Mukha pa namang maganda.

Badtriiiip.

***


Unang una, ang pinakaayoko sa lahat ay ang nagmumukhang tanga...at pinagmumukhang tanga. Buwisit. Alam kong hindi ako tanga. Oo, inaamin ko, marami na akong mababaw at hindi mababaw na katangahan, pero gusto ko ako lang ang makakapansin non. Ako makakapansin, ako ang makakapagsabi sa sarili ko na mukha akong tanga. O nagmukha akong tanga.

Pangalawa, napakaingay ng section na katabi namin kanina. Nag'd'diagnostic test kami, tas sila nagsisigawan. Parang kinakatay. Mawalang-galang na ho ah. Hindi naman namin kasalanan kung wala kayong pakialam sa Diagnostic tests niyo eh. Tanginang nerd na kung nerd. Nakaka-offend, nakaka-bastos, nakakahilo. Nagbabasa ako ng isang seleksyon sa Filipino exam na hindi ko maintindihan kasi nadidistract ako. Tapos sasabayan pa ng mga magiting kong kaklase. Siyempre patatahimikin ko sila. Siyempre hindi sila nakikinig. Kaya sa dulo, maingay kaming lahat.

Pangatlo, unti-unti nang dumadami ang tarantado sa eskwelahan namin. Mga punyetang tarantadong walang magawa sa buhay. Barilin ko kayo eh. Ekstinct esfeyshees (extinct species) na yata ang mga magagalang na binata.

Pangapat, napakainga ng mga busmate kong 1st year (AT HINDI KO SINASABI TO DAHIL FRESHMEN SILA. sigawan ka ba naman sa tenga eh.). Bigla ba namang sumigaw ng "TRAFFFIIIIC" pagkakita ng buhol-buhol na sitwasyon ng mga kotse sa labas ng aming eskwelahan dala ng iginaganap na From. From. Hindi Prom. From. Nakakabalahaw naman talaga ang boses ng katabi ko. Ang sakit sa tenga. Naka-iPod na ako ng ganyang lagay. Kaya pala napagalitan yung section niya kanina.

Tapos sabi nung driver na magbayad raw kami ng P5 tig-isa para makadaan sa Friendship Route. Kasi nga yung traffic. Mga anak ng putakte. Limang piso nalang ayaw pa magbayad. Nagbayad na raw sila. Sabi ko sainyo ayokong pinagmumukha akong tanga. Ayoko talaga. Kahit ganong kababaw. Sarap pababain eh.

Panglima, kagabi lang, suka ako nang suka. Kadiri. Pero totoo. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. Bigla lang akong nagising ng mga 10 ng gabi, ang sama sama sama ng pakiramdam ko. Hindi ko ma'describe yung pakiramdam. Basta kahindik-hindik siya. Parang hang-over. Kahit di ko alam kung ano ang pakiramdam ng hang-over. Pero ano ba. Talagang ang pangit nung pakiramdam. Parang masakit yung ulo na nahihilo na nasusuka. Sinubukan kong sumuka pero walang lumalabas.

Maya-maya, napahiga ako sa (anong tagalog ng lap?) lap ng nanay ko na lumabas ng kuwarto para malaman kung ano ang meron sakin. Kinuha niya yung basurahan. Pagkaupo ko...

...Ayun. Makikita mo yung Halaan (clams) at Galunggong na kinain ko nung gabing iyon.

Kadiri. Dyowk lang yun. Pero nasuka na ako.

Pinainom niya ako ng tsaa pati tubig.

Sinuka ko rin yun.

Pinakain niya ako ng skyflakes.

Sinuka ko rin yun.

Pero OK na ako ngayon.

Naiinis lang ako kasi bibihira ako mag-enjoy ng seafood tapos isusuka ko pa maya-maya. Sinisikap ko talagang i-enjoy ang seafood kasi yung mga kaibigan ko mahilig. Yung kras ko hindi ko alam kung mahilig, pero siguro mahilig siya. Tsaka hindi naman pwede na mapili ako sa pagkain,diba? Kaya sinisikap ko na mahiligan ang seafood.

Tapos isusuka ko rin. Pwe.

Pang-anim. From ngayon sa school. From. Hindi Prom. Nakakabanas kasi ang gwapo-gwapo ng kras (si dude #1) ko pati nung gelplen niya. Oo, gwapo rin yung gelplen niya. Joke lang. Ang ganda-ganda niya. Ang ganda ganda nila tignan. Nakakabanas kasi alam ko sa From (Hindi Prom.) ko next year hindi ganun. Kasi alam kong kahit kailan, hindi kami magiging ganun ng kras ko na isa...pati yung isa pa. Kasi yung isa...nasa kolehiyo na. Yung isa naman...eh mas matanda sakin. At tutal, extinct na rin sa eskwelahan namin ang desenteng, gwapong, mas matangkad sakin, hindi pat-patin, marunong manamit, magalang at pinakaimportante: available na binata na ka-edad ko, kaya hindi ko rin maaasahan yung mga yon. Ang sweet sweet nilang dalawa, lalanggamin na sila. Tapos ang ganda-ganda nila tignan.

Naiinggit ako. :-( Kelan kaya matutuloy ang From dream ko? Dalawang taon nalang ang nalalabi sa high school.

Pang-pito. Gutom na ako. Kaya ako naiinis. Sabi ko sa nanay ko huwag siya bumili ng junk food para tumigil na ako sa kakakain. Eh malas ko, may junk food sa school. Iskwa-skwa naman o. Kaya walang junk food sa bahay ngayon. Kailangan ko ng sugar para mabuhay. Parang awa niyo na.

Pang-walo. Kahit gaano ko lokohin ang sarili ko... tarantado parin ang tarantado.

***

Nakakapanibago't nagtagalog ako ano?

Eh kasi sabi nila nosebleed raw blog ko.

Ayoko namang isipin nilang conya ako't hindi marunong magtagalog.

Ang walang kwenta naman kung blog ako ng blog hindi naman naiintindihan ng mga kababayan ko.

Ano daw?

***

Wala ako sa mood na magreply sa mga tag at comment niyo. Baka sungitan ko lang kayo eh. Iniisip ko lang ang mga kapakanan niyo.

at 5:26 PM

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Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Listening to:
Feedback - Janet Jackson
(okay. she might be a teenie weenie bit older than my mom, and her earlier music was better, but i like this one. it's dance-y. and catchy. the video is a complete freakshow, though. what the hell is her ASIAN PERSUASION?)
Walang Kasing Sarap - Brownman Revival
(i like them. reggae is a tough genre, and they have it in the bag. they're probably the only OPM band that I like. but the video is...shite. what the hell is that? a freaking KNORR commercial? 'di pa marunong umarte yung girls. sorry. haha.)
Love Song - Sara Bareilles
(the non-acoustic version is weird, but i like it. not much of an acoustic person anyways.)

I just realized that I'm not much of a Colbie Calliat person

***

Bloody bostok (That's Vladivostok. WHUT.)

I find myself making lists and lists.

***


1. The every-weekend-north-mall-trips
Before this point in time, we used to go to Powerplant and GB all the time. Lalo na Powerplant. And MOA. I miss GB because...I have no idea. I just miss the restos and the cafe. Click Five memories haha.

This is ditzy, pero I really do miss the malls. I don't know. Maybe it's because I see the randomest people at the oddest of places (MOA, holy freaking hell.), or maybe it's because the shops are better there. Zara MOA is a dream. And the Dorothy Perkins/TopShop at Powerplant. Hmm. The former and the latter are a tip away from outbalancing each other on the balancing scale. (eyng?) And Serendra! I haven't been there in a while. HUHUHUHU.

Hello.

There's a reason why we're not doing these trips.
a) because we're saving up. we're having our house fixed during the summer.
b) everyone's busy.
c) to resist temptation! :-) it's simply painful when you find something you INSANELY want and not buy it...

...oh wait.

I HAVE MONEY I EARNED! :-)

2. Gradeschool days.

I find myself missing my gradeschool days every now and then simply because things were MUCH MUCH simpler back then. So simpler that we seek to complicate them to give the illusion that we're "mature". I mean the teachers were nicer, they didn't give shit if you're noisy (well they do. they just don't blow their top off very often 'cause we're in a open wing.), and I didn't have to study for the freaking examinations!

Wala pang cliques, wala pang cool. Walang stereotypes.

Haaay.

3. Summer

The heat. I don't think I freaking miss the heat. 'Cause the thought of last summer's heat is just...wow. Freaky deaky. I just miss the time I had in my hands. My "me" time. My "contemplating" me time. My "summer cleaning" time.

Which brings us to missing...

4. THE BEACH.

I'm not a beach person until I figured out that I was. Shemay. I want to hit the beach and the sand and I want to be somewhere tahimik. Not as noisy as Bora or Galera. Shet. Punta Fuegoooooooo :-(

5. My baby cousins...

I am desperate for family and relatives. I really really am. I'm really, insanely jealous of the people who're really tight with their cousins. 1st cousins? 2nd cousins? Don't matter.

And my two adorable baby cousins. I'd bet that when I finally grow up and have my own job and stuff, I'd be doting on the both of them.

Although in line with the traditions...They're ate and kuya to me. Explanation: There's this odd tradition that once siblings produce offsprings, the offspring of the eldest sibling gets to be ate and kuya and is held in higher regard...regardless of age.

But whatever.

I think my baby cousin Gaia and I will hit it off. I swear. She's a clothes person. She likes bauble and color. She LOVED LOVED LOVED the pink bag that I picked up for her for Christmas. Vicky couldn't be any prouder.

And Matty? The insatiably adorable and naughty Matteo? Chiara and he will hit it off.

I can't help but wonder what it will be like when we grow older.

God forbid things get awkward. Shet.

They're going here for Christmas!!! (I think.) WAHHHHH. Can't can't wait!

6. 2006

Had the best summer ever. The two people who made that summer...I miss so much.

The first person (God forbid I mention.) doesn't have to be missed in a...ehr.."romantic" way. I just miss the companionship and the laughs. And the late-night talks. And... hmm... I just miss the "friendship". Same thing with second person,actually. Do I dare reveal?

Do I?

Of course not! :))

Grabe. Things change noh?

2006 was also London year. Shit.

If I get back there, I PROMISE that I'll have better clothes, less weight and better hair. What did I know, I was 12 years old! Grabe. My face was awful. Shit. I should have hid in my awful gray hoodie.

7. Football.

Foot in mouth. I hate myself. T_T I miss the game, even if I sucked. The morning trainings. The friends. :-(

8. First year.

First year in HS the bomb. First time everything! And Miss Marcos is a lot of fun. The College Rooms. I miss those. Section 16, I miss the 50% classmates that we lost! Haha.

***


1. NOW.
I'm a better person. I believe that. I don't blow my top as often. I joke more. I'm happier. Stress-free. I make decisions on my own. I'm more understanding. I have better clothes.

Although I still have a lot of growing up to do.

2. My lovelife.
OY KELAN PA??? HAHAHA. No, seriously. One simple commitment to something makes a world of difference. 2 vs 2! (what am i talking about?) I'm not committed to someone, I'm committed to a promise. To myself. So I'd be happy.

3. My friends.
The best, the close and the acquaintances. I love them all. :-)

4. My section.
O-hah?! 27 the bomb!

5. My new habits.
As in SAVING habits. I get frustrated when I only save 5 pesos a day. San ka pa? Wala akong baon nang ganyang lagay, ha!

***

Life is good. :-)

***

Please visit my newly-updated friendster. :-)

shameless plugging. LOL.

at 10:17 PM

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Listening to:
A Certain Romance - Arctic Monkeys
(favorite part ko dito yung beginning. the drums and the guitars.)
Love Song - Sara Bareilles

***

I'm thinking of changing my link.

And I know what it's gonna be.

*Thinks hard*

Maybe I'll do it.

AFTER I do Angeli's layout and my mom's. And then I could make me a new one [a layout].

Grabe yung kay Angeli last last year pa yata hindi ko pa nagagawa. :))

***

I've started reading Bob Ong books.

I always knew I'll like them, I just didn't know why I didn't start reading them until now. Waaay back, I didn't understand what went on and such. Wow. I was THAT dim? Grabe. Haha. Tagalog nga hindi pa maka-register sa utak ko. Hahah! Conyang-conya eh.

So now, I'm reading Stainless Longganisa, borrowed from Benedict, a classmate.

Speaking of which. There's kind of a reading revolution at our class. The girls started to read Julia Quinn's Bridgerton series (it's incessantly addictive) and then the boys (give or take 2 girls) are reading Bob Ong's books. And then everyone else is just reading their own thing.

Nakakatuwa. :-) It's nice to see that people appreciate the books that you read. Hell, it's nicer to see that people like to read. I don't know. It's always "uncommon" to find someone who likes to read out of our class. Wala, feeling kasi nila gawaing nerd.

Mas maganda naman yata maging nerd kesa bobo, ano?

***

Before I get bashed in the girls' toilets for actually targeting for the bull's eye (on account of the previous statement. Yes, the one just before the asterisks.), I'll go back to Bob Ong.

Okay.

It's like a book version of Pugad Baboy. To me, ha. Well they differ in terms of targeting public and political figures (straight to the point ang Pugad Baboy.) and of course, Pugad Baboy is kind of a graphic novel in a sense na, so it has characters and settings and permanent fixtures. Yung kay Bob Ong, parang blog na ginawang libro.

Pero they both comfort me in a sense. I don't know how or why, they just do. And they both make me laugh. And they both make me think. And then they make me laugh again.

They're the type of books you'd want to read again and again, just because they're not serious, nobody gets heartbroken...and they're a lot of fun. Fun with a ny. WHUUUT?

Things are funnier in Tagalog.

***

Badtrip lang, I forgot the book that I borrowed. rawr.

at 6:48 PM

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Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Watching?
MTV (Love Song's on. Cool video. :P)

***

I finally have my digicam back.

Cheeeeers!

***

Thanks to all the gorgeous people who tagged and commented. I'd return your comments/tags soon. :P

***

• Other people absolutely hate misers. (Bloody hell.)

• If you want people to be in your life, you have to let them in.

This sounds really basic, but some people really need to be reminded of this. Especially this one.

• You're not alone, you just think you are.

• Looks deceive.

• Some people aren't who you think they are.

***

I know this is ditzy, but I felt like saying it out to the world.

Haha, how stupid is this.

Oh dear. Actually announcing it might actually jinx and mess things up for me.

Whatever.

Okay.

Uhm. I've actually booted crushes # 1,2 and 3. They are now replaced by crushes # 4 and 5, who used to lag behind crushes 123, but since 123 suck...of course they are now replaced.

Bilis.

Wala lang. Crushes 1 and 2 aren't doing it for me anymore. Excuse me, parang ang close namin eh. LOL. But really. Hahaha.

And crush number 3? Wala lang. Let's just say... I can't say much since he didn't have MUCH blogtime compared to crush 1 and 2... Well... I've outgrown him. I've become pragmatic and rational (it could be beneficial rin pala.) and I guess that... the spark is undeniable, and I'm still not used to un-liking him...pero it's a start. It's a step forward. And some things...you just gotta do. You gotta do what you gotta do.

So crush number 4. Huh. He's one year older than I am and he's a freaking musician. I liked him cause he used to sport the Beatles hair. During their early days. HAHAHAHA. No. Wala lang. I just like him. No one really knows that I like him, gave or take 2 people.

Crush number 5. HAHAHAH. Another something of a someone from 123. He's mighty older than I am, he's in college now attending one of those elite universities...and let's just say he's smart. Insanely smart.

HAHAHA.

Elaborate...Laterr.

at 6:45 PM

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Monday, February 25, 2008

Listening to:
Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches / Michael Cera&Ellen Page
(dalawang version eh. hahaha. it's a sweet song. besides, it was featured in JUNO.)
A Certain Romance - Arctic Monkeys
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band - The Beatles
(peyborit! :D)
Lady Madonna - The Beatles
(lady madonna, children at your feet. i wonder how manage how to make ends meet. :P)
Saccharine Smile - Donots
(drummania love. :))

Watching?
The Break-up @ HBO
(well, my sister is. i occasionally glance and get updated. that movie has the ugliest ending ever.)

***

Well I am in huge trouble.

What what what what have I done???

My life is a mess.

No, seriously. I'm not saying that for you to pity me (there are a surprising number of people who actually do that) but I'm stuck in a rut, and I don't know what to do.

My brain has gone to a party and took my heart with it.

What am I supposed to think with and feel with now?

***


5. She's nocturnal.
Probably due to the weird wiring of my weird body clock, I feel most creative, most productive, most at-ease during the night. I study the best at night, clean the best at night and make the good stuff at night. But of course I NEED to sleep at night, given the fact that I have to go to school the next day.

4. I clean to get my thoughts organized.
I clean my stuff in order to create the illusion that atleast ONE part of my life is in order. Not my future, not now, not my so-called non-existent lurrve life, but the things on my table, on my vanity and my closet are the ones getting the organized treatment. (eyng?)

3. I like old school stuff.
If you don't read the Listening To part of almost every post...then I would like to let you know that I like old things. I just realized. Pop art (andy warhol, anyone?), Vintage Cars (i wanna mustang so bad), Old School music (the clash =P), Historical Romances (julia quinn now.), Vintage Stuff (hahah shades circa 70s. :P ) and of course... Old School movies.

2. I like old school, local, teen movies.
Well, kahit hindi local. Basta old-school teen movies. The old-school teen movie part...well I've known it since I started craving for Molly Ringwald movies. And hello, Grease Lightning anybody?
And then the local part...Well I just discovered when I was channel-surfing one night, and then I saw Aga (howdahelldoyouspellhissurname?) and his dudes doing their thing and then suddenly I craved watching their movies too.
The operative adjective here is OLD SCHOOL. Ayoko ng new school teen movies, lalo na yung local. At least back then: a) gwapo naman talaga yung actors and b) MARUNONG SILA UMARTE. eh now the new actors brought in can't even act to save their lives. grabe. At least there are a select few who are exceptions.

1. Sometimes, I'm a shy person.
SOMETIMES is the operative word here. Of course you don't see my shy side. Most of you have known me for years, or have probably watched me laugh my ass out from afar. No one will believe me kasi ang INGAY INGAY ko. But I really am a shy person at times, lalo na kapag bago lang. But if I feel like I can trip and jam and whatever with the new kids, edi I'd easily shed the shy persona fast. But really. I'm a shy person.

(tumatawa na sila sa likod.)

at 8:07 AM

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Friday, February 22, 2008

***

Saw Megalomaniac's video on MTV the other day. It's graphic perfection. Shet.

Saw Drive's video on MTV as well. Probably the nth time I've seen it, pero I still watch it. It's insanely nice.

Wooo Incubus. Oh no, I'm becoming a fan! HAHA. Should start uploading that Incubus CD that we have.

***



HOLY SHITE. Another good example of graphic perfection. Not exactly your biggest Lennon fan (I'm more McCartney, 'cause he's cuter during their early days. HAHAHAH. And Starr. Starr is da bomb! I loved the drums at the beginning of GET BACK!) but wow. Wow. One of the reasons why I want to become a graphic designer. Masterpieces like this. Shiiitee.

***

I just met the coolest girl in the whole universe today (next to Maja Ivarsson, of course.)

WHY SHE'S COOL:

1)She owns an SLR.

A freaking SLR. SLRs that a) cost a lot of money b) demand much money for maintenance and additional stuff c) I COVET SO BADLY!

And it helps that she takes INSANELY GOOD PICTURES with it too. Grabe.

2) Similarities.

We have the same taste in music. Same interests. More or less same taste in clothes. Whuddahell.

3) The eye candy doesn't hurt either.
(Kahit sabi ni Camille hindi siya gwapo.)

4) She's not maarte.

If I were a guy, and she were my age, and she were available, I would like her.

A girl who's smart, pretty and with SUBSTANCE. SUBSTANCE that is very much lacking these days!

Cheers to girls with substance!

Labels: beatles, random stuff, rants

at 5:58 PM

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Thursday, February 21, 2008

Listening to:
Cause Iiii love the way you say good morning. :) (I heard it from one of ETC's commercials.)

Topic-appropriate songs:
Because of You - Ne-Yo (ay grabe)
Realize - Colbie Calliat (i know puro nalang REALIZE maririnig mo, but yeah. the lyrics hit the target)
Perfect - Smashing Pumpkins (I want to cry. :'( )
That Song By The Spice Girls Whose Lyrics Are Put Below: Too Much Ba Title Nun?

***

Too much of something is just as tough.

***

OH NO OH NO OH NO.

Is it possible to like someone too much?

Of course it's possible, what kind of question is that?

Agggggh. I don't like how I'm feeling anymore.

But it feels so GOOOOD. But I don't like it.

I miss sooooo much things, and I just can't freaking live in NOW. Now, when all I have is nothing.
How can you live in the present when all you have is nothing? Going back would lose you nothing.

But that's what I think.

It's just painful how you have all those hopes and dreams and you know that in the future, you won't share it with that person. Just because. It's annoying and it's painful and if I think of things from that point of view, I won't have anything to think of at night, or during Filipino time (haha.)

I mean why can't I ever have a decent love life? Even my younger sister has a lovelife (even if she kind of shuns the dude. but a lover is a lover.)

Of course. Love can wait.

Wala lang, I just want to know how it feels like at this point in time. But I believe that someday...I'm going to SCORE! HAHAHAHA.

Ang dali sabihin para sa iba, naexperience na nila eh. Tsk. Playing with things that are NOT toys.
That is beside the point.

Anyways.

Wala lang. I'm just feeling sucky. 'Cause dude # 1's leaving (but he has a girlfriend anyways), and dude # 2's leaving, and like HELL, I do not want to be left with dude # 3! I need to be DIVERTED! This is NOT HEALTHY!

Maybe I need to take up sewing to get distracted.

***

This is definitely procrastination because I have two more exams tomorrow, God help me: Biology and Social Studies. Freaking taxonomy and the legacies and imperialism and whatnots. Whaddahell.

Anyways. I saw a girl at the library today, and she had the COOLEST camera at hand. It was SLR and it was making funny clicky sounds when you click the shutter button.

I lovelovelove it and I wantwantwant one.

at 4:10 PM

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Monday, February 18, 2008

at 10:10 PM

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Darling.

Darling.

Darling.

It's been too long.

Have you come to wave me off,

And leave me sailing on my own?

You hit the fast forward.

I hit the rewind.

We're never on time,

Never on the same line.

Darling Darling Darling.

Can't you see.

It's been too long,

For you and me.

***

That was a really sad and pathetic attempt to write a decent piece of poetry. Mind you, that was... a) on-the-spot b) something that was initially meant to be a letter, but evolved into a poem instead.

I like it though. It's like an inside joke between me...and...ehr...me.

***

You are really not who you used to be.

Or maybe...

You haven't changed...

But I have.

***

I lately just realized that I am a sadist.

I click on links I should never even risk clicking (even if there aren't any...ehr...*banned* content in it. no,you PERV. i'm not talking about porn!). I go to pages I shouldn't even go to. And I listen to gossip I should never even believe.

But I'm probably the most pessimistic optimist on the planet. I'm a stickler (is there such a word?) for expecting the worst,so that if ever the worst happens...a) i'm prepared and b) it wasn't as if i didn't expect it. and if ever that the opposite happens...a) there's twice the joy and b) there's twice the joy.

Another thing to prove my sadism is that I actually am quite drawn into taking the Eng/Archi career track because I think I am going to take Industrial Management Engineering. Or Management Engineering. Whatever's on that note.

Everyone knows Eng/Archi is the hardest career track. It involves making scale models of things and calculating the whole width and breadth of the whole field and HELL it involves a LOT of MATH and PHYSICS. I dislike Physics. I'm more of a Chemistry person. Well atleast back in 1st year. I got higher grades in Physics, but I enjoyed Chemistry more. Haha.

And besides. I now believe that I have good potential and foundation to be a Math genius (I did get a perfect score in our quiz kanina. This is not gloating. This is false gloating. EVERYONE got a perfect score. But atleast I didn't have difficulty obtaining the answers, devah??? Wtf am I talking about. I'm such a fat loser.) provided that I work really really hard.

Eh. Tamad ako.

And now I'm scared outta my pants.

What am I going to doooooooooooooooooo?!?!?!

And besides. Taking PhySci is like...having my lovelife personified go in front of a truck load of shit and just stayed there, unblinking, waiting for the truck to crush it.

WHY? you ask.

You don't want to know.

I don't even want to know.

WHUT?

This is what's wrong when you have a blog, you're lantad, and you actually NEVER learn to keep your own secrets.

Mahirap gumamit ng codename. Hahaha.

***

I should let you know that I have this crazy, psycho comfort-thing that I do.

There was once this blog whom I really liked to read a lot. And she now stopped blogging.

And to comfort myself?

I read her past posts.

What the hell do I know. It comforts me in an odd, strange way. I don't even try to understand the workings of my mind, and I encourage you to do the same. No one understands me. It's not an emo thing to say. No one really does. 'Cause I'm odd. I'm a freaking oddball. Heck, I can't even understand myself sometimes.

at 9:47 PM

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Listening to:
Freshmen - The Verve Pipe
Anyone But You - The Moldy Peaches
Love Song - Sara Bareilles

***

For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen.

And how we're guilt stricken sobbin' with our heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to slip, we'd say

I can't be held responsible
'Cause she was touching her face
And I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

***

We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else
But you

The pebbles forgive me, the trees forgive me
So why can't, you forgive me?
I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else
But you.

***

I learned the hard way
That they all say things you want to hear
And my heavy heart sinks deep down under you and
Your twisted words,
Your help just hurts
You are not what I thought you were
Hello to high and dry
Convinced me to please you
Made me think that I need this too
I'm trying to let you hear me as I am

I'm not gonna write you a love song

***

Well aren't we a bit sentimental today?

Hmm. Not really. I just really really love these songs.

DOES ANYONE KNOW WHAT SONG THE BAND PLAYED IN THE SPLASH PARTY THINGY AS AQUAMARINE AND RAYMUND DANCED IN THE MOVIE AQUAMARINE? The one that went..."yeah,yeah". Cause I couldn't find it in the soundtrack list. And I couldn't understand the lyrics, so I can't possibly Google them.

I love that one too.

***

Oh wow. I just realized I had a different version of "those" days.

I'm on a ultra-high sungit mode, and anyone in my way is prone to a) berating b) telling off c) cursing d) all of the above.

I reminded everyone I'll be having a bad day, so I'm excused...I hope.

Waaaaaaahhh. I feel like one shiteload of shite.

at 5:45 PM

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Friday, February 15, 2008

Listening to:
(it's playing in my head)
Hold it Don't Drop It - Jennifer Lopez

Watching:KC Concepcion on MMK.

***
Some people just deserve to be in hell and burn.

***

Wow. I'm scared out of my wits right now.

What if I lose my mom?

Oh my God. I am so paranoid.

I don't think I want to know what it feels like to have everything taken away from you in one swift motion.

And to feel the guilt and pain of actually being implicitly blamed for the death of your dad.

Shite.

I don't want to know, and I never want to know.

I'd rather have a shitty lovelife.

But I want a nice one still.

But you can't have everything... where will you put it?

at 6:08 PM

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Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Listening to:

Why Can't I? - Liz Phair

Wonderful - Everclear

***

Why can't i breathe whenever I think about you?

***

I was very close to having one of those days awhile ago. You know, those days when you just feel like shite from the very moment you woke up from bed.

I certainly felt like shite the moment I got up from bed. My head pounded like tiny little devils were trying to get out of it. Of course, this was not because of a hang over, but simply because I slept at 2 am, doing our Biology project (who knew that would take insane amounts of time?).

Wow, I'll never ever sleep at that time again. Not when I have to wake up 3 hours later.

And then I come to school, routinely (although I'm starting to abhor routines) and we also had our morning assembly at the field. Oh wait, WHAT FIELD? I thought fields were supposed to be green. Ours on the other hand is...well, brown.

Since the students weren't used to the new arrangement, we were having a hard time adjusting and then suddenly our section got wedged between sections 26 and 28, and I was seriously having a hard time breathing...and I became dizzy. I hate crowds. I really do.

As if that was enough to put me off, my PMS just jumpstarted today (oh heck, it's INSANELY late, it's not even post-m... anymore.) so I started getting annoyed at the petty things in life.

But y'know what?? I got over it. I put it behind me and just said..."Nothing's going to ruin my day."

And nothing did.

Well something almost did, but that is besides the point.

Aren't you proud of me? I'm not the super-sungit moodswinger anymore! :) Although I still am mataray, that's a given.

***

Ohhh dear I am stuck between Eng/Archi and Business/Entrep. Oh dear. It sounds insanely odd, but I think I'm going to take up Industrial Management Engineering when I go to college. I mean it is a stable course, and it still has the management part. Besides, it's rare that my mom "suggests" when it comes to making my decisions on this area, so I really want to listen to her. She followed her dad when she was in my place and look where it got her. She's a successful woman now.

And she's insanely hardworking.

I...on the other hand...well, on selected moments (hey, I stayed up to 2 am for that Bio project. that's hardworking. or maybe it just took me a lot of time because I was procrastinatin.)

But I'm scared to death about the Math in Eng/Archi. I think I could do it...it just scares the heck outta me. HAHA. IF they have CAD there though, that'll be insanely cool. :)

It's ironic how I'll practically be an engineer when it's one thing I NEVER EVER wanted to be.

Oh and besides, I have to think about my classmates next year. If I do Business, I'd probably get my classmates who chose Business and a few other people. If I do PhySci, well I'll be getting the insanely insane math geniuses and then some [hubby carl and his honey! :)) and then daddy. =P ] so that's gotta be a lot of fun.

One friend who took up PhySci just adviced me to enjoy if ever that I do choose that track.

Heck, I'm good at enjoying even the insanely boring stuff. :))

***

While at the shower kanina, I was thinking about how photography makes me happy. Sure, it kinda wreaks when you don't get lots of pictures with people, but come to think of it...yeah. I'm usually the behind-the-scenes person eh.

Oh I want an SLR so bad.

But I want a MacBook first, still. I want the white one. It reminds me of my VTech days. Haha.

***

Okay. That's it. Marco's with someone.

Which leaves me with...Dodong.

Dodong :)) I don't even like him anymore. It's like,napipilitan lang ako, hindi ko naman alam kung bakit.

Oh wait. Meron pang isa!

There's Argo. :)

Ooooh, somethings of someones.

***

Malapit na ang Valentine's Day! Makakaya ko naman kaya? For sure the day will be showered with sweetness all over. And according to my calculations (oh what the hell), Thursday is my bad luck day. Unless tomorrow becomes a bad luck day, so maybe my good luck will be moved to Thursday.

WHAT?

Wala lang, it's just so sad thinking everyone's getting something and I'm not getting any.

But I'm not bitter or anything, it's not in my nature to be bitter. Wala lang talaga, it just made me think.

Ah shite, my past two valentine days have been sucky. Sana naman this year will be different, 'no?

Ohwell.

Advanced...

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY, everyone!

Labels: random stuff, rants, those days

at 7:51 PM

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Monday, February 11, 2008

Listening to:
Leave Before the Lights Come On - Arctic Monkeys (their live version's great. I almost always don't like listening to live versions of stuff. But they're really good live. )

Brianstorm - Arctic Monkeys

***

Our Biology project requires us to gather pictures of our "evolution". So I titter-totter to Picture City and have my pictures printed.

Holy hell, pictures are so much nicer when they're on print. Wala lang, I haven't seen printed pictures in years. You know, proper pictures. :)

Wala lang, I think it's nice when it's just there and you can see it the whole time and it's tangible and stuff. :) I hope somebody gets me a Sony printer someday. So that I could always print my shots.

I now resolve to always print pictures.

Labels: quickie

at 4:50 PM

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Friday, February 8, 2008

Listening to:
the camper velorium ii: the backend of forever - coheed & cambria
(i missed their sound. :) )

***

ngayon ko lang nalaman na marami palang tao sa congreso na hindi alam ang ginagawa nila.

Panginoon, tulungan niyo po sila. At ang mga taong pinamumunuhan nila.

***

basahin niyo yung post ko sa baba. :)

at 11:36 PM

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Listening to:
for once? nothing. my day's been noisy.

Watching?
Videojug!

***

Got our cards today. Great grades except for Math.

Oh shite. What a downer. Ah well. I wasn't enjoying it at that time.

***

I know America's a great country and it's not at the same time. It's great because it's huge and powerful and it's where most things originate. Bands, brands, labels whatever. It's great because it's the land flowing of milk and honey, a place for opportunities. It's not because they waged war against Iraq causing lives of many people and they're insane commericalists.

But really. I'm jealous of that country, somehow.

You heard of Barack Obama and Hilary Clinton?

Yan ang mga politikong kailangan ng bansang to. Dedicated people. They're both running for the Democratic party (tingnan mo. bilang na bilang lang parties nila. apat ata? republicans, democrats, libertarians, greens and socialists. the better known people are the republicans and the democrats. )

I don't know if a party can have two running candidates, but if that was allowed, these two totally deserve a spot.

They both signify change. Kelan kaya tayo makakakuha nun?

IF Obama is elected, he will be the first ever black president. IF Clinton is elected, she will be the first woman president.

San ka pa?

Haaay nako. I'm starting to lose hope on our politicians. Oo, ganun ako ka'delusional noon. :-(

It's just sad. I mean, kanina, I was watching TV, and I was thinking...if I became a politician, what will I resolve first? Anong ip'prioritze kong project? Kasi diba, parang sabay-sabay, ang dami-dami, tapos wala pang pera! Wow. Eh asan yung pera? Ayon, hanapin mo sa mga branded na Ferragamo wallet ng mga nakaupo sa puwesto.

I mean, I don't know that much, pero I'd really like to think everyone out there is just there to get money (so sorry.) Fine. Kung meron man talagang bukal sa kalooban ang pagtakbo...bilang na. At hindi pa natin alam kung sino sila. Ewan ko. Nakakaiyak ang estado ng ating bansa ngayon.

Nakakainiiiisss. ="(

Away kayo ng away, paalis nang paalis. Importante ba talaga yung position kung nasan kayo? Do what you can with what you have. Does it matter kung speaker of the house ka, or senator or whatever? Everyone is capable of change, even I am. So does power really matter? Position?

Hindi ako magtataka kung mukha talagang kayong mga t*r*nt*d*ng naghahakot ng pera.

Mga buwisiiiit. Agh. I now know why my blog idols are losing faith in you people.

Gusto ko pa umasa sa presidente natin. Oo, masarap na siya paalisin. Pero we need the time that she has left. Pag napaalis yan, GULO nanaman aabutin. May bagong malalagay sa upuan. Marami nanamang away, maraming magc'complain. Just...stop freaking fighting and help your drying country, for God's sake.

Maganda, masarap yung feeling at nakakatuwa when EDSA 1 happened. Same thing I guess with EDSA 2. Pero 3? Hindi ko na yata kaya. Magmumukha lang tayong mga batang brat. Pag ayaw, paaalisin.

The next thing I know, election nanaman. Puro pangako. mga T*ng*n*ng pangakong NAKAKAPAGOD NA. ayoko na. Nagugulat pa kayo nauubos na mga tao dito sa Pilipinas. Mga walang hiya kayo. >:|

I guess part of the blame goes to the Filipinos. We are responsible for voting. Democracy nga eh, di naman ginagamit. Hindi pwedeng dun tayo sa sikat, dun sa mahilig mamigay ng groceries. Dun tayo sa taong matatag, magaling at matalino...sa bukal ang kalooban, sa ginintuan ang puso (wtf.). Pag ganyan ang naupo, balang araw, kayo na bibili ng sarili niyong groceries.

I will look forward to the day when the Philippines will rise once again.

(p.s. hmm. i still think there are a selected few who know what they're doing out there. no guarantee they're not stealing, though.)

haay this is getting all too tiring.

(p.p.s.s. oo nga the country deserves to know how cong. nograles plans to do his job. he's now the newly-elected speaker of the house. he is the 4th highest-ranking officer in the country, after all. in fact, this dude is practically invisible. i don't even know him! )

***

I didn't have to know what the ZTE Broadband deal was about after all.

I just needed to know why JDV was ousted from his position.

I'll take it from there. :)

***

I now just discovered the roundabouts of CS2.

I can now do gradients and animate.

Just the pen tool left, and I'm all set on getting used to CS2 (I'm a PhotoElements baby kasi. we have it easier there. a bit easier, I guess.)

I'm pretty excited about the pen tool and all that.

And now, YouTube is getting pretty handy to me when it comes to tutorials.

Yey.

***

Different set of friends came over today. By different, I meant not the usuals (angeli, angelique hazel and barbie). Had carl jp madz yani johan over today. JP Madz Johan and Yani have been here before. So Carl's pretty much a noob to our 'habits' (like the joining of hands during prayer before eating.)

Crazy people.

Hahaha.

Started off with having Yani over, since we had to do our project. And then I asked Hazel and Madz to come over, since it's kind of lonely kung kaming dalawa lang. And then suddenly Hazel wasn't allowed to go. And then suddenly, later on, I was texted by Carl that he would come over. Okay. So the house was up and about until 9:30 when they all left.

Sorry, no pictures. Was having too much fun viewing Multiplys (oh shet. HAHA. hahahahah hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. another rite of passage @ vicky's place.) and Videojugs. :) I was having too much fun to even remember I had a camera.

***

i now know how to whistle. even the infamous cat-call whistle i could do (done when a BABE passes by.) magawa nga yun pag dumaan si case number 1. eww.

ngayon the only thing I have to learn is:

how to whistle with a tune.
how to whistle with my fingers (i know how. i just have to practice!!!)

woo. cheers to my whistling career!

Labels: random stuff

at 10:01 PM

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Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Listening to:
Le Disko - Shiny Toy Guns

***

I'm warning you, this might be a ditzy post.

***

I laughed so much kanina, I think I'm having a laughing withdrawal.

***

I've never had someone make me sigh that way. In fact, I've never sighed subconsciously over a guy in my whole entire life, I think. And then really, we all just stood there, watching the slow-mo action thing going on.

Oh. WOW.

You remember my case in point # 1? The dude with the girlfriend? The something of a certain someone? Well the dude became a babe. He had a few things changed with his look (I'm not saying what. It's probably WAAAY to obvious if I said what he did. Okay fine. He changed his hair. I'm not saying what he did. HAHAHAHAH.) and then he IMMEDIATELY looked like a whole new person.

And it also helps that he's graduated from his rugged-ish,rockstar style. Okay, so he's still quite that, but he's kind of moved up to the next level. Much more a rockstar. Oh yeah. :))

To give you an idea of what happened...

***

Characters: Angeli, Angelique, Vicky and Abby
Setting: in the middle of the whole students' lounge.
Scene:
Abby's crush passed by, so she and Angeli squealed.
I and Angelique on the other hand, got surprised so we squealed too (imagine the noise that created)

And then what happens is that we actually get entangled with each other, resulting with me, holding Angeli's shoulder, my face over her shoulder, her face quite over mine and Angelique just there in the side.

I don't know where Abby went.

So anyways.

Given our entanglement, we were laughing and stuff. And then...

He came.

He was looking over his shoulder (so his face was facing the other way.), with a bag over his shoulder, smiling. And then he looked.

And the three of us?

Angelique: ooohh!!!
Angeli: *gasp*
Vicky: "haaaay."

No, seriously. I sighed and went like.."haaay". Sabay pa kami ni Angeli. I can't quite remember Angelique's sound, but it wasn't a sigh/gasp. It was some kind of high-pitched sound.

God knows how odd that looked. Us practically ogling that dude out.

And then we all zoomed back to reality. And we all couldn't believe how we reacted.

You know why?

1) Because before, they wouldn't even think that this dude is remotely cute.
2) We've never reacted that way before.
3) We didn't know we were reacting that way until we zoomed back to reality. It was a subconscious kind of thing.

Oh Lord.

***

Of course the story didn't end there. We had to spread the word (to Erika and Hazel...) and then Angeli and I just had to have second servings.

Uhm, excuse me. You took my breath away. Can you please give it back? (magandang pick up line yan.)

So we went where we thought he went (to the gym)...But alas, the babe wasn't there. We saw Marco playing basketball there though. In fact, I was ALMOST hit by the ball. Eh mabuti nalang suwabe ako (whut.). I basically just ducked when the ball came my way. Woot.

Okay. No babe there. So we went back. (Angelique and Hazel didn't come with us. They claimed the gym was too far to go for someone who took your breath away.)

Going back, we were caught by two excited girls practically bobbing up and down.

And you know who they saw.

So we talked to them...and then suddenly...

Angelique just flailed her arms and Hazel just stood still.

And we all know who they saw.

I turned my back and I was blown away for the second time.

And thank GOD HE was at the student's lounge UNTIL we left.

Imagine. Unadulterated viewing of a certified babe. A babe na hindi mayabang, hindi alam na babe siya, hindi malaki ulo at mukhang mabait. Charming and swabe.

What more can you ask for?

***

Of course, since we were at the student's lounge at the usual 16 tambayan. And of course the boys were there. and OF COURSE they were wondering who we were drooling over.

Oh shite. I think they KNOW who we're drooling over.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't tell. :))

***

Don't you think it'll be embarrassing if the babe actually reads this? It's not that my blog is insanely popular or anything, but we are connected after all. The someone of this babe is...well... Hahahaha. Let's just say this person (the someone) knows this blog. And this person PROBABLY knows who I'm talking about. Or maybe this person doesn't. This person probably thinks I still like the guy I used to like.

Tsk.

Hey, that babe should be thankful that other people admire him...besides his girlfriend. And we mean no harm. :)

***

I'm a smitten kitten over two blitzens.

More smitten to the babe than the other, of course. Oh no, three blitzens pala! But let's not talk about Marco for now. Hahaha. So the other blitzen who I've never talked about in here. The poor dude. Tsk. Never given the limelight. Hahaha.

I like you but I don't want to. :-P

at 10:01 PM

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Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Listening to:
What I Like About You - The Romantics
(didn't know it was done by the romantics until I Wikipedia-d it. when i downloaded it kasi, it said it was by the ramones.)

***

SO...

have you seen matteo guidicelli at kung fu kids?

our househelper was watching, so without anything better to do, I joined her.

And mighty heyll, I have something to watch for every night.

He's not quite a good actor, though.

But I'm not much into actors anyway.

OH woooooooooooooooooowzeee wow wow.

at 10:04 PM

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Listening to:
The KKK Took My Baby Away - Ramones
Because of You - Ne-Yo

***


more pictures HERE

***

Sorry for the lack of creativity. Wasn't in the mood for some serious photoshopping. And yes, like i've said in my multiply...and I can't quite put my finger into it... I don't want to talk about the outreach. No, like hell, it's not that I didn't enjoy it or anything. But there's a positive reason behind my non-talking about it. Oh well.

It's so bitin. :P

***

Okay, so maybe it's tiring to talk about everything that happened during the outreach. So I'll give you the post-it version.

Bus ride to La Huerta together with some CIC Volunteers. Aircon broke down, had to stop every few minutes or so to un-heat the over-heated bus. Or so i think. Picture pictures. Arrived there and taught. Three subjects, two sections. Reading, Math and PE. Section 6 and 7, grade 4. Reading taught first in section 7, Math first in section 6. And then Reading in section 6, PE in section 7. And then ran out of time.

Incredibly pooped the moment I sat down on my seat in the bus.

But no matter how tiring, I still enjoyed. I enjoyed a lot. :)

In fact, another story...

***

There was this little grade 1 girl peeking out of the door, checking out all the commotions and what nots. I noticed this little kid and immediately went to her. First she was shy, so I asked her name and stuff. When I finally found out she was in grade one (she responded "7" when I asked what grade she belonged to. Not much of an idiot to realize she meant she was 7 years old and therefore in grade 1), I asked her why she was there. She didn't answer. So I gave her a choco drink instead.

This is why I preferred to teach the grade 1 kids (not that I didn't like to teach the grade 4 ones. they're smart and behaved and participative and simply just amazing in almost every sense of the word.)...because they are a) much more cuter (with the implication that CUTE = SMALL) b) they're much more endearing c) they're innocent. so you probably won't expect bad fingers and curses thrown on your way.

But yeah. It was fun :))

Now THAT was a ditzy post.

Be back when feeling more creative.

***

It's pretty obvious my mind's a mess, yeah?

at 9:03 PM

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Monday, February 4, 2008

Listening to:
Enter Sandman - Metallica (needs some desperate calming down.)
Because of You - Ne-Yo (why the hell am i even listening to this at this point in time?)

***

My nerves are frazzled and I AM SO FREAKING ANXIOUS.

And confused.Now Angeli wants to go to PhySci, and I'm like, there's nothing wrong with that. I just don't want it to seem that I'm tagging her along everywhere she goes. I mean I practically am, but it's only because I'm looking for a friend to be with. And I don't want to make her feel like...weird or whatever.

Now what. Major Foot in Mouth disease thing going on.

And there's absolutely no wrong with switching to PhySci, I mean I'd rather have a hard time than be in a class with people who absolutely have no shit to give with whatever we're doing. And besides I'm a huge environment person. I adapt easily. So if ever that I adapt to their non-caring ways...well. Bye-bye, honors.

Haaay naman naman naman. At this point in time, I just long to belong.

***

Oh shite. What am I going to do?

WHY why WHY oh why do I like making things difficult for me???

Shiiiiiiiiite.



ahh, the wisdom of comic book characters. they just say the right things at the right time.

I wish life were a comic book. Things are much easier there. Things are limited to a few dialogues per panel, a few plots per comic. Pag tapos na, tapos na.

(I ask you, WHAT KIND OF RATIONALE is that??? )

***

I hope I sort my mind out by tomorrow morning. I have some kids to teach. Man.

I love teaching and all that. It's something natural to me. And I love kids. Oh, I really really love kids. Even naughty ones. But I find it hard to take in charge when your mind isn't even sorted out.

What am I talking about?

I'm still a kid!

at 5:14 PM

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Sunday, February 3, 2008

Listening to:
Blitzkrieg Bop - Ramones (meron na akong isa pang favorite band!!! i'm going to save up for that CD, no matter what. or maybe i'll just borrow. whatever. i'm still saving up for that navy blue version of my Mushroom Zara Jacket.)
Rock N' Roll High School - Ramones

***

Oh shite. I forgot kung sino makakasama ko sa Entrep. Masyado akong kampante that I'll be classmates with my 27 mates.

Holy shite.

What have I gotten myself into?!?!?!?!?!? :)) :))

Naaah, this panicking is overrated. I'm a tough bitch. :P

at 8:02 PM

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Listening to:
Isn't She Lovely? - Stevie Wonder (does not fit the anxious mood, but I'm listening to it anyway.)

***

Last Friday, we had "the most important one-fourth sheet of paper in *possibly* our whole lifetime." Shocked at the sudden timing, it all came unexpected. We saw it coming, but we never thought it would come too soon. Some people were left gaping with indecision,a select few were sure of what to put. And then there were the people like me...who just had their mouths open and their brains' gears moving overtime. My problem was...I didn't know what I wanted in life. Or maybe I did, I'm just too chicken to go somewhere completely beyond me. The others knew what they wanted, but their parents didn't want the same. Which I guess, is much harder.

But in the end, everyone had to make decisions. Kahit kinopya (Hello Jiggy. Ay ako rin pala halos kumopya. Heehee.), kahit hindi . And somehow, in the future, we have to learn how to pay the consequences of our decisions.

And bloody hell, I am scared out of my wits.

***

Most of my classmates want to be Doctors. A number want to be Engineers. A few want to be Lawyers.

Ako, tanungin mo kung ano gusto ko maging.

I want to be a f*cking CEO, baby.

Of course, you can't be a CEO in Medical Science. Nor can you be a CEO in Engineering and Architecture. The same goes with Arts and Letters.

So look where I've landed. Where I've never even thought I'd land before.

Business and Entrepreneurship.

*collective gasping*

Si Vicky, Entrep? Oh my.

Seeing how in our school, the so-called "gifted" (oh, i am using this word with much caution.) people typically fall under MedSci and PhySci (since they're the harder career tracks). But not me. I don't think I'd ever be a doctor, and like hell, I don't see myself doing numbers my whole entire life.

But in all fairness, I had an INSANELY hard time deciding.

And since my dear dear friend Angeli is on the same boat as I am, she paddled the shit creek with me. We were "practically" on the same track, even if we didn't want the same things. Hell, she's probably the only person more confused than I am. (I mean that in the nicest way possible)

***

Okay. So here's WHY I crossed out the 3 other career tracks as my Top 1. and WHY I even considered them.

Medical Science.
First and foremost, EVERYONE is in here. Atleast a good 75% of our class will be going here. Ahh, the future doctors and nurses of our generation. Dapat may discount ako sainyo pag nagkasakit ako, ha.

Second of all, well, I don't think I would mind very much if I had to memorize TONS of things and a MASS of requirements, as long as my friends are there.

Third, well, I want to know what I'll be missing out on. Malay mo, medicine is for me pala, I just didn't realize.

REJECTED because: Well, I just don't think I'd ever be a Medicine person. It involves so MUCH blood, time and projects. Sayang lang if I go here and I won't be in the Medicine area of profession.

Engineering and Architecture:
I don't even know why I considered this one. Oh, right. Angeli was considering it too. And besides, even if Math is my weakest subject, I do find it enjoyable (it all started on a lonely night with nothing but me, my Math notebook, my iPod and some radicals.). I'm really just insanely careless when it comes to solving--even the most basic stuff to be remembered come amiss. And besides, I think I suck in Math because I think and believe that I do.

I was considering to take up Industrial Management Engineering, diba? So if ever that I want to take that course, at least I'm all geared-up and ready. And if I didn't, well atleast my Math will improve, and I will finally, finally benefit from it.

REJECTED because: Even if I enjoy Math, it doesn't mean that it's something natural to me. It's something I have to work hard for. And I've decided that why will I take up Industrial Management Engineering if I don't think I'd enjoy it? I'm usually the happy-go-lucky person. And even if I work well under pressure, it doesn't mean that I have to work under pressure the whole time. I have limits too you know.

Arts and Letters:
Oh, it's hard to believe, but I find this offer irresistable. I've been told that they were planning to put a PHILOSOPHY elective on this one. Holy shite. Philosophy? That's my thing. Pilosopa ako eh. No seriously. I'd bet most of people my age haven't heard of Carl Jung, Sigmund Freud, Soren Kierkegaard or Karl Marx. This is my thang. :) (Nerd much.) And I don't even know how it became my thang. It just was. Tamang-tama to. For the people like me who think too much and over-analyze. Besides, I'm a good observer. I observe people a lot. I observe as far as my four eyes can take me.

And besides, I was planning to take up (initially) Communication Arts in DLSU diba? And our guidance counselor said that this track is for the truly bilingual. I am that. I swear to God. Nanunumpa ako sa Poong Maykapal.

REJECTED because: It can only take me so far. If I don't decide to take up ComArts, sayang lang yung last two years ko of high school. Because unlike some people, I do care about the career track I choose. I want to take these as opportunities for success during college and after college. I mean these are opportunities na, man. Who would be stupid not to take advantage of it?

And besides, I can always take up Philo units. And even if I do take up ComArts, well I don't think I'd lose anything if I don't take this track.

and then there was one.

WHY I Chose Business and Entrepreneurship. And WHY I was having second thoughts.

Initially, my mum was trying to convince me to take up this career track because whatever course I choose, this will come useful in life..eventually.

But of course, I was thinking..."sino naman kasama ko dun?" I'd be there nga, but I don't have anyone with me naman.

And besides, the pressure of choosing the harder career tracks are there.

But I guess, in the end, I chose it because it was where I'd benefit the most. And I guess it was what I wanted. In fact, my heart is strangely at peace with my decision.

Sabi nga ng lasing na kaibigan ni Katherine Heigl sa 27 Dresses... "If it's the right thing to do,then why doesn't it feel right?" (or something like that.)

Meaning...well I feel right,right now (is there a pun to pardon?). SO maybe it's the right thing to do.

And right at that moment when I passed my one-fourth (I was bouncing up and down with gay abandon, screaming entrep ako!!! entrep ako!!! ikaw, entrep ka???) I remembered what I told my guy friend JP before.



So yeah. If I was happy without a specific, pin-pointed reason, then maybe it was the right thing to do.

Good luck. I'm still scared shiteless of the "entrep ka LANG?" thing. But of course, I'd be screaming right at your face: "i want to be a f*cking CEO. because unlike some people, I have a purpose"

Good luck nalang sa classmates ko next year. Well good luck to me, I hope I still stay in one section with my fellow 27 mates who chose Entrep too. And the not-so rotten people. And Angeli, of course. Although I think she wants to be in PhySci. Well if she wants to be there, then I'd be there too. I don't know why. Dearie, they don't have calculus in Accounting. My mom said so.

at 4:31 PM

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Listening to:
The KKK Took My Baby Awaaaay - Ramones
(wooooooooo the kkk took my beby away, they took her away, away from me.)

***

at 11:09 AM

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Listening to:
Jenny - The Click Five (haven't heard this song in ages.)

***

I get absurdly frustrated when I don't get to go anywhere over the weekend. Fine, call me spoiled or whatever. I just feel the need to get on my toes and trek anywhere. Which is contrary to my home-bound Virgoan nature.

Usually, our weekend escapades include eating out, watching a movie and going to a mall...

And it really really insanely bums me out if I don't get to go anywhere (except if something's up.)

And now, with a rift going on between me,my sister and my mum, I don't know if I will ever see the living daylights of the Power Plant Mall. Atleast not this weekend.

Oh bugger. :(

Even ATC would do. :))

at 10:27 AM

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Saturday, February 2, 2008

at 11:00 PM

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Listening to:

1. Move Along - The All-American Rejects
2. All You Need Is Love - The Beatles (I just realized...mahilig magparinig ang iTunes.)
3. Starlight - Muse (loves the clapping. :)) )
4. That's What You Get - Paramore (oo nga, mahilig nga magparinig ang iTunes.)
5. Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off - Panic! at the Disco (haven't listened to this song in ages. well it sounds fresh to me now. and still, nagpaparinig ang iTunes. This is insane. Anyways, why do they have to make their titles so long? It's annoying.)

***

Just saw 27 Dresses starring Katherine Heigl (of Grey's Anatomy and Knocked Up fame) and James Marsden (of Enchanted and X-men *he was cyclops, which is really just awful, considering how BEAUTIFUL his eyes are...*)...

which brings me to ponder about my non-existent love life.

Oh, my non-existent love life.

A few days ago, you could say I had a love life. A decent one, even if I'm not in a "relationship" with someone else.

But of course, of course. Nothing good ever happens between me and my apples (of my eyes).

Case in Point #1:
This guy, I knew because he was (well he still is...) a something of a someone. And well, when I liked him, he was available at that time.

UNTIL...

I viewed his Friendster profile and discovered he had a crush on someone. Crush palang.

THE NEXT DAY...

I found him tagging along with this pretty girl.

AND THE NEXT DAY AND THE NEXT DAY...AND THE NEXT DAYS TOO...

He was tagging along with the pretty girl who eventually became his girlfriend.

It didn't actually break my heart, because I think the girl is insanely cool. And if he's happy, well I'm happy too. In fact, they're one of my favorite couples. They're so sweet, they'd make sugar a run for its money (ano daw?).

It's just uncunning how he managed to land a girlfriend in quite a short span of time...(and I just started liking him at that time.)

Case in Point # 2:
This one actually has a potential to be untrue, but still.

This dude that I just liked is courting someone. Well relatively, I just liked him. And well, he's courting a pretty girl. But if EVER that this is true...well. I'm happy for them.

Case in Point # 3:

Oh, long story made short.

Hmmm... Let's see. How do I do this?

Current state of union: Dude has an unheard-of girlfriend and well...

Things are crazy right now, I don't know what's happening. (What's true and what's not.)

But let's see. According to my observations, dudes who you'd usually see as menly-men would be turned into not-so-menly-men once they land girlfriends (aheeem.). They turn into a big mass of mush. Mushy mushy mushy much.

Am I happy for this one, in case true?

Heartbreakingly, yes.

IF true, well then. We've got to move along, move along like they know I'd do. But if he's happy, I'll be happy too. But God help me when I see him with her. I hope I fight the urge to shoot her (But then, kung tumama ang bala, hindi natin alam kung kanino talaga galing. 'Cause I'd bet there'd be many girls who would want to shoot her.). The lucky b*tch.

I should stop. Nahahalata na 'ko eh.

***

Hmmm...

at 9:58 PM

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